Suzie “Straight Edge” Goldman is the 18 year old local straight edge girl and girlfriend of Krusty Kennan. Suzie, like the rest of the group has lived in Gutsville her entire life. However, she lives on the rich side of town and hasn’t came in contact with the group the rest of her life because she was attending a rich boarding school.
A major contrasting element to the group, Suzie is straight edge. She doesn’t drink or participate in recreational drug use. She is the voice of reason among the Krust Crew and will normally say “I don’t think that’s such a good idea” when she hears plans she doesn’t like. Her boyfriend, Krusty, normally attempts to avoid having Suzie know if he’s done something she’ll disapprove of by any means necessary. Suzie also has an intense dislike for Hawk, whom she argues with over everything. The group thinks she’s bossy.
A very talented lead guitarist, Suzie used to perform with the hardcore band ‘Death Killer’, but left after breaking up with her boyfriend, Hardcore Polar Bear, who was also in the band.
Krusty Kennan is increasingly uneasy about this, but attempts to make peace with HPB due to Suzie’s wishes.
Suzie is an avid fan of science fiction, enjoying Star Trek and Doctor Who. She likes to attend comic conventions and participates in cosplay. She is known to have costumes for Amy Pond, Ripely, and Liz Sherman.
She has a very intense hatred for Fauxy the Feminist, disliking the fact she is very misinformed on what feminism actually is. The fact Fauxy is dating her ex, HPB, is just icing on the cake.
She very much has a tom boy personality, not liking things such as chick flicks or doing her make up. Her favorite film is “Hobocop”. She is also a ‘shopaholic’, and junk food junkie.
Her known close relationships include:
-Krusty: Krusty is Suzie’s boyfriend. Krusty first saw Suzie the day she started working at Guts Crew Records, and it took weeks for him to build up the courage (and intelligence) to ask her out. Even though she’s a sober, stern and strict and he’s a carefree fun loving alcoholic, the two enjoy each others company and oddly complete each other. She tries to steer Krusty into picking his life up piece by piece, and normally succeeds, even though he does it in a very unorthodox manner.
-Sheila: Sheila is Suzie’s best friend. The two have known each other since attending boarding school. The two spend a lot of their time together. Sheila disproves of Suzie’s relationship with Krusty, however Suzie blames it on the fact Sheila doesn’t have a boyfriend of her own.
-Hawk: Hawk is Krusty’s best friend, and grows jealous of Suzie when Krusty shows her more attention.
-Douchebag Singer Songwriter: DSS has a major crush on Suzie, who Suzie normally avoids. Even though he never straight up hits on her, she’ll take any communication with him as “sexist and offensive.”
-HPB: HPB is Suzie’s ex. They’re still pretty good friends.
In the Krust Toons animated series, Suzie is voiced by Brynn Lancaster.